The Once and Future Father

  “Dylan, I haven’t made love with anyone in over nine months,”

  Lucy said.

  Maybe, if he tried very hard, he could resist his own urges. But Dylan couldn’t resist her. Hadn’t the strength to turn his back on what she was offering him so willingly, not when every fiber of his body wanted her.

  Not when he wanted her.

  Ever since he’d walked out on her, he’d felt as if half his soul were missing. A soul he’d only found the very first time he made love with her. When she had shown him that making love was more than a matter of body coming to body. She’d shown him that there were souls involved, and feelings that transcended the physical.

  “Are you sure?” he asked.

  Rising on her toes, her lips a scant breath away from his, she whispered, “Very sure.”

  The last thread of his fraying resistance gave way….

  MARIE FERRARELLA

  THE ONCE AND FUTURE FATHER

  To Tiffany Hsiang,

  For all the wonderful things you are,

  and

  all the wonderful things you will be

  Books by Marie Ferrarella

  Silhouette Intimate Moments

  *Holding Out for a Hero #496

  *Heroes Great and Small #501

  *Christmas Every Day #538

  Callaghan’s Way #601

  Caitlin’s Guardian Angel #661

  ‡Happy New Year—Baby! #686

  The Amnesiac Bride #787

  Serena McKee’s Back in Town #808

  A Husband Waiting to Happen #842

  Angus’s Lost Lady #853

  This Heart for Hire #919

  ††A Hero for All Seasons #932

  ††A Forever Kind of Hero #943

  ††Hero in the Nick of Time #956

  ‡The Once and Future Father #1017

  Silhouette Yours Truly

  ‡The 7lb., 2oz. Valentine

  Let’s Get Mommy Married

  Traci on the Spot

  Mommy and the Policeman Next Door

  **Desperately Seeking Twin…

  The Offer She Couldn’t Refuse

  ΔFiona and the Sexy Stranger

  ΔCowboys are for Loving

  ΔWill and the Headstrong Female

  ΔThe Law and Ginny Marlow

  ΔA Match for Morgan

  Silhouette Special Edition

  It Happened One Night #597

  A Girl’s Best Friend #652

  Blessing in Disguise #675

  Someone To Talk To #703

  World’s Greatest Dad #767

  Family Matters #832

  She Got Her Man #843

  Baby in the Middle #892

  Husband: Some Assembly Required #931

  Brooding Angel #963

  ‡Baby’s First Christmas #997

  Christmas Bride #1069

  Wanted: Husband, Will Train #1132

  Wife in the Mail #1217

  Stand-in Mom #1294

  Found: His Perfect Wife #1310

  Silhouette Desire

  ‡Husband: Optional #988

  Silhouette Romance

  The Gift #588

  Five-Alarm Affair #613

  Heart to Heart #632

  Mother for Hire #686

  Borrowed Baby #730

  Her Special Angel #744

  The Undoing of Justin Starbuck #766

  Man Trouble #815

  The Taming of the Teen #839

  Father Goose #869

  Babies on His Mind #920

  The Right Man #932

  In Her Own Backyard #947

  Her Man Friday #959

  Aunt Connie’s Wedding #984

  †Caution: Baby Ahead #1007

  †Mother on the Wing #1026

  †Baby Times Two #1037

  Father in the Making #1078

  The Women in Joe Sullivan’s Life #1096

  ‡Do You Take This Child? #1145

  The Man Who Would Be Daddy #1175

  Your Baby or Mine? #1216

  **The Baby Came C.O.D. #1264

  Suddenly…Marriage! #1312

  ‡‡One Plus One Makes Marriage #1328

  ‡‡Never Too Late for Love #1351

  The Baby Beneath the Mistletoe #1408

  Tall, Strong & Cool Under Fire #1447

  Silhouette Books

  Silhouette Christmas Stories 1992

  “The Night Santa Claus Returned”

  Fortune’s Children

  Forgotten Honeymoon

  ‡In the Family Way

  World’s Most Eligible Bachelors

  ‡Detective Dad

  ‡The Baby of the Month Club: Baby Talk

  The Fortunes of Texas

  Expecting…In Texas

  3, 2, 1…Married!

  “The Single Daddy Club”

  Books by Marie Ferrarella writing as Marie Nicole

  Silhouette Desire

  Tried and True #112

  Buyer Beware #142

  Through Laughter and Tears #161

  Grand Theft: Heart #182

  A Woman of Integrity #197

  Country Blue #224

  Last Year’s Hunk #274

  Foxy Lady #315

  Chocolate Dreams #346

  No Laughing Matter #382

  Silhouette Romance

  Man Undercover #373

  Please Stand By #394

  Mine by Write #411

  Getting Physical #440

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 1

  “Some guys just don’t have any luck, you know what I mean?”

  The burly police detective abruptly stopped talking, a coughing fit seizing him. “I mean, this is supposed to be one of the safest cities of our size in the country, and this poor jerk gets wasted right here, in beautiful downtown Bedford.”

  Separated by a four-foot-high partition, Dylan McMorrow could hear the crinkle of cellophane. Alexander, the man who was talking, was dipping into his supply of hard candy. Cellophane wrappers marked his trail in the precinct wherever he went.

  “Maybe not,” Hathaway, Alexander’s partner, speculated. “The body was moved, remember?”

  “Yeah, but it was found here, so that puts it in our jurisdiction.” The sound of drawers being opened and closed in quick succession floated over the partition. Alexander was always looking for something to write on. From the sound of it, he hadn’t found it. Dylan concentrated on shutting the distraction out. He had an overdue expense report to get out. “This is my first homicide. You ever handle one before?” Alexander asked Hathaway.

  The other man’s laugh was tinged in disbelief. “I’m from L.A., remember?”

  “Sorry.” Alexander shoved another drawer closed. “Well, at least we’ve got an ID on him. Ritchie Alvarez.”

  Dylan’s long fingers froze on the keyboard. The squad room, like everything else within the Bedford Police Department’s three-story, modern building, was the last word in precision, neatness and state-of-the-art equipment. There were computers on every detective’s desk rather than a faltering, centrally located electric typewriter the way there had been at his last precinct.

  But Dylan wasn’t thinking of his last precinct, or even what had brought him back here to Bedford, California, after a requested six-month loan-out.

&
nbsp; He was thinking of a woman. A golden-skinned woman with hair the color of a sensual midnight sky, honey on her lips and laughter in her dark eyes.

  Lucy.

  He felt his gut tightening the way it always did when he thought of her. Dylan reminded himself to breathe. Slowly.

  Alvarez was a common-enough name among those with even a marginal claim to a Spanish heritage. And as for Ritchie…

  How many Ritchie Alvarezes were there in a city the size of Bedford?

  Getting to his feet, Dylan looked over the partition at the two other detectives. “How do you know his name?” he asked.

  Detective Marcus Alexander was startled by Dylan’s question and almost dropped his coffee mug. He steadied it at the last moment, glaring at Dylan.

  “Jeez, McMorrow, don’t you know better than to sneak up on a man like that?”

  There was no expression on Dylan’s face. There usually wasn’t. It made it harder for people to second-guess him that way.

  “I didn’t sneak. You were standing next to my cubicle. Talking rather loudly.” Dylan’s voice, like his manner, was low, with an edge to it that warned the listener not to test him. “How do you know his name?” he asked again.

  Reaching into his pocket, Alexander took out a clear plastic pouch. Inside was a single sheet of wrinkled paper.

  “It’s on this bank statement. We found it crumpled up in his inside pocket.” Alexander held the pouch out for Dylan’s examination. “Killer must have missed it when he took the victim’s wallet.”

  The other detective, Mick Hathaway, turned around the chair he was sitting in and looked up at Dylan, curious. “Why? You know him?”

  Dylan regarded the bank statement. It was to notify one Ritchie Alvarez that his checking account was overdrawn. Again. That was Ritchie to a T, Dylan thought. He gave the evidence back to Alexander. “Might.” His eyes shifted to Hathaway, the more experienced of the two. “You have the crime scene shots on you?”

  “Right here.” Brushing his jacket aside, Hathaway reached into his inside pocket. One by one he lay down on the desk the four instant photographs taken of the victim. Hathaway slanted a glance in Dylan’s direction.

  “Damn,” Dylan commented.

  “Then you know him?” Hathaway asked.

  Dylan dragged his hand through his unruly black hair, wishing he’d been wrong. “Yeah, I know him. Knew him. The name’s right.”

  “Know if he has a next of kin?” Hathaway questioned.

  Dylan blew out a breath, and tried to blow back memories he didn’t want crowding him. It didn’t work. “A sister. Last I remember, he was staying at her place. Always did when he was down on his luck.”

  Hathaway shook his head. “Looks like he got even more down.”

  “Looks like.” Dammit, Ritchie, why weren’t you more careful with your life? Dylan wondered.

  Disgusted at the waste, bright shining moments shimmering in his mind’s eye, Dylan let the photograph drop back amid the others. He fought a brief tug-of-war between his conscience and his need for self-preservation. It wasn’t much of a contest.

  He looked at Alexander. “Look, I know it’s your case, and I’m not trying to horn in here, but if you need someone to break it to his sister—”

  Alexander looked relieved beyond words. “Hey, be my guest. I wouldn’t know where to begin.” Belatedly, he looked at Hathaway. “Okay with you?”

  Collecting the photographs, Hathaway carefully tucked them away again. “More than okay. If you want to take down her statement—”

  Dylan nodded. Lucy wouldn’t have had anything to do with whatever it was that had brought Ritchie to this miserable juncture. But to say so might arouse further curiosity, and the two other men were already looking at him as if he’d just bared his soul to them. Though partnered, Dylan kept to himself most of the time, and he made a point of never saying any more than he had to. It gave the other guy too much ammunition that way.

  He glanced at his watch, but he knew what time it was even without checking. He was on his own time right now. He’d come in early to finish up the expense report, but that would have to wait until he got off later. “I’m not due for my shift until another couple of hours. The sister’s statement probably won’t be much to take down.”

  As Dylan began to leave, Hathaway rose to block his path. Dylan saw the questions beginning to form in the other detective’s eyes. Maybe Dylan shouldn’t have said anything, but to leave this kind of news for a stranger to break to Lucy just didn’t seem right.

  “Where do you know him from?” Hathaway asked.

  Dylan sidestepped the older man. “We shared a couple of classes.” It was far more than that, but he didn’t want to get into it. Into the friendship they had enjoyed and what had come after.

  Surprised, Alexander called after him. “You mean he’s from around here?”

  “Born and raised” was all Dylan said as he walked out the door.

  He knew the way to Lucy’s place by heart.

  Lucy would probably say he didn’t have a heart. Not that he could blame her. But he’d done what he’d done more for her than for him. Someday, she’d appreciate that.

  Or not, he amended. Eventually, it would all be one and the same. Time would see to that. Maybe it already had, he mused. Over the last nine months, he’d purposely lost track of her, purposely stayed away from all the old haunts where he thought he might run into her.

  The only place he couldn’t escape her was in his mind. But he would. Eventually.

  He’d known Ritchie a number of years before he ever met the sister that Ritchie was so fond of. There had been something different about Lucy from the first moment Dylan saw her, but he’d tried not to notice, tried not to pay any more attention to her than he would any one of a number of beautiful women who passed through his life. But she’d been more, right from the start. And for a while, for eight precious months, he’d deluded himself that he could have a normal life, the kind he’d only heard about.

  Part of him figured he had to be crazy, seeking Lucy out after nine months of a self-imposed moratorium. Dylan knew he wasn’t in a place where he could say he was over her. He doubted that he would ever really be over Lucinda Alvarez, but at least it had gotten to the point where she didn’t start and end each day, lingering in the perimeter of his thoughts like the deep scent of roses. He’d managed to get through whole chunks of the day without so much as thinking of her.

  Or what they could have had.

  If he had been someone else.

  But another part of him knew he had to do this. Owed it to her for the history they had. She didn’t deserve to hear about Ritchie from either Alexander or Hathaway, good men both, but not exactly sensitive when it came to something like this.

  Yeah, right, like he was Mr. Sensitivity, he silently mocked himself as he waited for the traffic light to change.

  She didn’t deserve to hear the words at all, he thought impatiently, but that was life and he hadn’t written it. All he could do was try to change some of the footnotes.

  Dylan realized that he was gripping the steering wheel as if he were engaged in a life-and-death struggle and loosened his fingers. He wished he could change this particular footnote. Ritchie had been a good guy. Just incredibly unlucky.

  Weren’t they all? he thought.

  “I’m sorry, Lucy,” he whispered under his breath as he turned down her street and saw the neat dove-gray-and-blue-trimmed stucco house.

  So where was Ritchie, already?

  Impatient, Lucy Alvarez glanced at her wristwatch, the one with the band she had yet to replace. But she was still stupidly sentimental about the watch. It had been a gift. The first gift. When there had been promise in the air.

  She sighed, squelching the temptation to look out the window again. It wouldn’t make her brother appear any faster.

  Ritchie probably forgot, she thought. She’d asked him to take her to the doctor just this one time, because it was so hard for her to find a comforta
ble position behind the steering wheel these last few weeks. Two weeks overdue, she was painfully aware of every second that went by beyond her delivery date.

  He’d promised to be here.

  But Ritchie’s promises were always the same—made quickly, with enthusiasm, and then forgotten. Not from any malice, but just because that was Ritchie. He had the attention span of a gnat.

  Lucy nibbled on her lower lip, debating whether or not to call a cab. She didn’t want to be late for her appointment.

  However, by the time the cab finally arrived, she would probably miss it altogether.

  Still, if he wasn’t here… Lucy picked up the receiver and began to dial.

  The sound of the doorbell ringing had her hanging up the telephone. Ritchie was here. Finally. The fact that he was ringing the doorbell instead of unlocking the door himself didn’t strike her as particularly odd. He’d probably forgotten his key. Ritchie would’ve misplaced his head if it hadn’t been attached.

  Someday, he was going to drive whatever poor woman he made his wife crazy. Until then, he was hers to look after. Moving awkwardly, Lucy made her way to the front door. The doorbell rang once more.

  “What’s the matter, Ritchie, lose your key again, not to mention your watch? You’re late—”

  Flipping open the lock, Lucy began to launch into a lecture she knew would do no more good than any of the others she’d given him over the course of the last few years. Her tolerant smile faded as she abruptly stopped and stared at the man standing in her doorway. Her heart leaped up, and then down, lodging itself somewhere, uncomfortably, halfway in between.

  For just the briefest of seconds, she thought she was hallucinating.

  But she was wide awake and he was here, filling out her doorway with his dark good looks the way he had once filled out her entire life.

  Dylan.

  Funny how much smarter you can become in just nine months.

  Her hand on the door, she kept it where it was, half opened, half closed, a barrier to keep him out. The way he had kept her out.

  Pressing her lips together, she raised herself on her toes to look over his shoulder, hoping to see the broken-down car her brother drove coming up the street. But it wasn’t in sight.

  Her eyes narrowed as she looked at Dylan. “What are you doing here? If you’re here to see Ritchie, he’s not home. I’m waiting for him myself.”